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Sponsor |  anitab | Jul 21, 12:22pm | Link
"To know oneself is to study oneself in action with another person."
The one person that is the hardest to get to really know may be yourself. Studying yourself while you are alone may result in some insights. But it's also likely to produce a lot of made up thought loops and doubts in your mind. A good way to really learn more about yourself is study yourself in interactions with other people. How people react and act in these interaction can over time teach you a lot. And what you think and how you react can perhaps teach you even more.
What you see, feel and hear in other people may be a reflection of you. The things you learn by thinking this way may not always be pleasant, but they can be enlightening. They help you to see yourself and also how you may be fooling yourself. And these powerful insights can be very valuable for your personal growth. So, in interactions with others, try asking yourself: what is reflected? |
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Sponsor | | rumisong | Jul 22, 5:03am | Cool - Bruce Lee was understanding something of the mirror of relationship (J Krishnamurti was apparently a big influence on him) - and as its said here, some of this 'truth' may not be easy or pleasant ...
Ive been looking at this thing that arrives in my head: "I cant BELIEVE how this person doesnt listen!" (whoever 'this person' may be, the point is "not listening" has arrived in this relationship - whether it is casual, or close - acquaintance or stranger, Im still allowing this word "relationship" for all of these - because we are all connected and related in existence)
what invariably arrives with this, is "self-importance" - I see that self importance comes with this not listening in the form of outward pointing at so-and-so ... "he just cares about himself" - "she hasnt heard a word Ive said" - "they are so concerned about only their little petty interests" - etc ...
I SEE this, this is so clear to me, isnt it? ... their self-importance - but, the above wisdom is saying that this must be my self importance if Im seeing it arrive at all ... what does that mean? that they are NOT self important? that I'M the one whos not listening?
well, I can meet this advice with this kind of indignance, cant I? which of course will end up by illustrating in itself the truth of it, but Ill be too indignant to notice that - my disdain will have taken over, wont it have? - or I can investigate further, deeply, from the heart and not the brain ... how is it that just because I see self importance in another that this is my own self importance? "Let me really look at this, bravely, with courage - and open myself to whatever I find there ... Im willing - this is important to see if this is true ..."
I dont know if you see this, but I am seeing it now - as soon as I investigate this, the self importance in me disappears, and so does theirs - in me, it has become compassion, and in them it has become pain ... ONLY self importance in me, will let theirs stay as self importance! - only my own self righteousness will WANT to keep them as wrong - only my own pain, will need to ignore compassion for indignation, and refuse any reasoning that theirs is justifiable ... ME FIRST! ... my ego cries out - "NO, I dont want to have to be the one to bring compassion to the world, I want to be the one who receives compassion and so THEN I can help to distribute it around - but give it to ME FIRST!" ... where did I get the notion that compassion is some sort of gift that Grace or whatever would bestow upon me at some later date when Ive been "good enough" to receive it? - "me first!" the ego says ...
"yes, you first" wisdom says ... YOU bring the compassion - and there it will be for the world - but only self importance, YOUR OWN, is keeping you from doing so ... and so now we get to ask again, "who is not listening?"
so, there is a new twist on all the old wisdoms, isnt there? because of this "mirror" thing - and seeing that its up to ME to investigate it, not "someday Im going to understand this" -
"seek first to understand, then to be understood"
"be the change you want to see in the world"
"love thy neighbor as thyself"
... but I have to LOOK at the mirror - and really look deeply into it - Polish it over and over until not a speck is left on it - until not a thing rises in me any longer ... if something arrives that is not compassion, then look and look and polish the mirror again ... THAT is loving my self, and my neighbor - that is Love, pure and simple - THEN, and only then, does one get to see peace - and this is the gift from Grace that we've been waiting for - it was there in us all this time - we just needed to bring it forth, and "we" couldnt do it alone - we NEEDED relationship to see this - that was Grace all along ...
Bruce Lee, no one said this was going to be easy, did they ... |
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